Wednesday, 27 January 2010

14 Ways To Save Mother Earth

  1. Prevent landfills - Burn your rubbish. (not churches)
  2. Avoid open burning - Burn your rubbish indoors.
  3. If you see a litterbug, go Burce Lee on him and bury him alive when he's unconscious. We're all biodegradable anyway.
  4. Save water - Pee on grass
  5. Avoid using the flush. If it's yellow let it mellow. If it's brown flush it down. See again number 4
  6. Stop washing your clothes. Buy new ones instead and give your soiled ones to those who need it. Recommended for those born with a golden spoon (or teeth) in their mouths.
  7. Plant a tree, burn a book. Don't forget to burn it indoors.
  8. Don't exhale when you smoke.
  9. Leave the trees alone! Stop eating veggies!
  10. Save electricity - Play in the dark.
  11. Kill all herbivores. See again number 9.
  12. Call Father Earth.
  13. See number 16.
  14. Strengthen trees - Poop near them.
  15. Text Father Earth.
  16. See again number 13.
  17. Set up ridiculous blog posts on "How to save the earth"
  18. Forget how to count.
  19. Recycle! Cycling is good exercise.
  20. Be handsome.

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