It's been 4 years now since Lahmheit first started. It's hard to believe that it's been 1,460 lame days since this blog first began broadcasting its abominous signal and began hacking onto the internet, corrupting minds of younglings.
I want to personally thank everyone. First and foremost, the writer of this blog. Thank you for being so cool and sexy and awesome - spending countless hours drafting and perfecting your posts to ensure that it displayed the utmost standards of comedy and of course highest quality doodoo-ness. Most of all, i would like to thank you, dear readers for showing your everlasting support towards this cyberspace-loaded nonsense in which I created, boosting my hit counter and allowing yourself to be bombarded by wave after wave of subliminal messaging, which makes me happy. Thank you for somehow managing to tolerate this page.
Which brings us to the main part of this post.
I'm sorry! Oh God. I know I am. I know I'm the worst. And I'm trying to fix it! Really! Well, try is a kind of a strong word. It's more of a passive hope with no desire to put forth any actual effort. It's the thought that counts, right?
The points is, I didn't mean for it to turn out this way. I had so many great ideas of humour writing, to tickle yo' funny bone, to make you LoL and RoFL. The road to comedy hell is paved with good intentions, I suppose. But come on. Confucious Says? The Ultimate Card? If The World Was Without Lameness? JianShen's Dictionary? Ode To Food? Being Lame is Good??? I'm sorry I even started this whole thing up. Honestly, what was I thinking? Trying to be funny on the Internet? People on the Internet aren't funny! If they were funny they would be funny in real life, and have no reason to be on the Internet. Stupid stupid stupid!
It would be easy, perhaps, to blame the founder of Lahmheit, JianShen, for what this perverted blog has become. It's all your fault Jian!
Anyways, to anyone too free to find another website to waste all their time on, I'm terribly sorry, and thanks for reading.